You would need to make a deal with Google(*) and pay them an unreasonable amount to be able to do this openly user-hostile action.
Or to put it another way: Not possible, find an other way to do what you want to achieve. I'd recommend starting a new thread and in it explain what you want to do, and ask for input from the forum.
Yeah, that's true. I made the assumption that the app in question would be a "normal" app, running in a typical end-user device. That might have been a bad assumption.