Its been 3 days with some stability, my laptop has 8GB ram, then I was curious. So i found the ini file and set
MaxRamForDex=5120
and in all my b4j apps I have added, #VirtualMachineArgs: -Xms2G -Xmx2G
and instead of out of memory errors every now and again, they seldom happen, especially when I open the abstract designer. I also noted that when I dont use File > Recent files to open a new project, closing B4J and then opening it helps. Yes ram usage jumps to 1G on the task manager within 5 seconds of opening my library.
From time to time I close and restard the IDE as the keyboard lag in the IDE just becomes a headache. Why the out of memory errors have decreased? I dont know. They happen, but not as often as before, maybe its this or something else, I dont know.